If only I could...

Last day I'll be with hubby before raya. Yes, obviously it torn me apart. I'm afraid to go thru all these. My first raya without hubby and kids. I dont know how to face it, really am. I wanna run away, but i couldn't.

I always wish, at one time, the clock will stop ticking. Then I can feel the warmest of your love, longer. Then I can have another minutes extra to hold your hand, another blinks extra to look into your eyes, another heartbeats xtra to say how much i need u. I miss you all the time, at the same time I know, I can't reach you. It's killing me.

Another day has gone..

Half of Ramadhan has gone. Never been to the mosque for terawih not even once this year. I get sleepy as early as 9. Once in a while, I pushed myself to do the 'xtra' thing in this Ramadhan. I got tans of stuff in my mind, trying hard to enjoy life and avoid those bad thing come across my mind. I broke down, sometimes, most of the times. Nevertheless, I know for sure, I can always talk and ask from Allah.

Terima Kasih Sayang

seluruh tubuhku terpaku dan membisu
detak jantungku berdebar tak menentu
sepertinya aku tak ingin berlalu
berikan cintamu juga sayangmu
percaya padaku ku kan menjagamu
hingga waktu menjemputku

We won't know and will never knew, how long can we be together. But I promise U, I wanna see you upthere.

Thank you so much dear

She's super sweet. I received two raya cards from my little gal, in these 2 days. I never thought of receiving it from her, considering her condition. But it was all amazed. I miss her damn much now. She is doing very well with her Smart Reader class. I'll do anything to help her undergo her normal life. What ever it takes...

Call me anything...

Life is doing extraordinary fine. I'm blessed surrounding with all good people, who have the gift of making me 'unhurt', for it is one of God's best gifts. It involves many things, but above all, appreciating whatever you have and loving each other is endless happiness. To introduce myself, as a second wife to a good husband, shall it be humilating or disgusting. Call me anything, i'm too strong to be defeated by such words. I'm content with my husband love, grow me stronger everyday. And the kids, all their laughter makes me wanna be even stronger.